You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
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