im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
no you cant smoke seaweed
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
