More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
