i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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