So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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