My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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