The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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