Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
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