how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
How does it feel to date your dad?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
