so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Well I just put wine in my tea
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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