they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
