Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
this is an emotional support booty call
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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