i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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