Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
