I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
