Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
