it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
