Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
