from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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