I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
My dick has a subreddit
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
