What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
and you fell through a lawn chair
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize