I want to stick my p in your. b.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
