Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
