I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
