we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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