I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
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