so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
