I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
