yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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