The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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