Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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