When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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