More tranny stories later!
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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