he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
