He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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