new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
false alarm, still single
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