"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize