I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
