I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
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