I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
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