It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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