no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Randomize
