She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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