I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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