Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i will never coherently bang her
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
