they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
