found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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