I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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