Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize