Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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