nut hugger
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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